It feels like I have been going back and forth all day. Not really sure why but I want to use. Nothing I haven’t been through before, but today it seems like it is fueled by anger though I am not sure.
My back is hurting again. Ran this morning and maybe that made it worse. I really have to find a doctor that can help me. Maybe that is why I want to use…the constant pain in my back.
I don’t even want to go to the meeting tonight. I just want to give up…argh. I hate this feeling. I just keep thinking about the steak quesadilla that I will have for dinner at a shop right near the meeting. Whatever gets you there…
Feelings change.