My attitude is completely shit. I have it out for this world again and it is probably inevitable that I will use. Can an addict stay like this for a prolonged period of time and not use? Maybe I have a hole in my program? Who knows but I feel like shite and want to throw it all away. I am so sick of hearing myself say that and not doing fuckall about it.
Argh. These little events are getting more and more frequent. I guess the city/work and all that shit is finally catching up to me.
I am clean just for today.