The sea and the apartment
I was just hanging out and at some point I drank. I was so devastated that I drank I couldn't stop drinking. I felt completely terrible. I was in this…
On and Off
Sometimes it is a little of this and a little of that...What is the trick to consistency? Is there some intrisic property of it that I am missing? Either I…
Where I’m At
Well it usually isn't until I feel like I am going to die that I am able to live again. This time was no different. It may sound melodramatic but…
Again
So this dream was from the other night... I was in this apartment and I was trying to date this woman who is in the program, but yet someone which…
I can’t do it.
I am really sorry but I just can't do this anymore. I have given it my all. Four plus years and it is time to throw in the towel. I just can't do this anymore. I have so much support but I don't want to help myself anymore I want to be alone. I want to die. I no longer want to live. Feeling like this is no fun at all. I can't do anything and walk around with this knot in the bottom of my stomach. Argh. Maybe I will run into that which strips me of my being. I am no longer commited to saying "No."
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